Journey

I never expected much from you /. I just want th basic respect and th tender love you guys used to give me . I dont need branded items or th best food . I just want tt motherly and fatherly love you used to give me . I really miss the times when guys will laugh at my jokes and i really miss th times when you give me comforts when im down , give me encouragement when i fail my exams and tell me to do better , telling me tt " heys , well done" when i do well and especially , I miss th feeling of HOME . Because now you only say tt im stupid when i say my jokes , when im down you just shut me out of yr heart , when i fail my exams , you blame and scold me .
You guys are always argueing non stop , Im tired of it . When i do well in my exams or other tests , you guys will just tell me " why isit not a perfect score ? " When i fail my exams you hit my hard in my heart by telling me " you just dont have th brains" . And now , this home is just a place for me to sleep in .
I can never cry in front of you guys again , I can never hear those compliments from you again , i can never feel th Love from you guys again , i can only hope for it to happen .. I can never tell anyone how i feel because I dont know how . I cant let my tears fall in front because i never showed anyone such a weak side of me . I just hope you two know tt you guys were really once a loving parent tt i can never have any complains . But ever since i was 7 , you guys changed totally . Im put in th hands of somebody else and not you two . I just want you to know tt Im not as strong as you think i am , but no matter how strong am i , i still have th weakest side of me . Me too , have a vulnerable side . But you know what ? I can never show tt vulnerable side of me to anyone ...
If you guys say tt you guys did yr duty as parents , i can just say tt whatever you think . I dont bother anymore . Settle yr problems yrself , dont only come to me when you have no one to go to because im th last on yr list . Im really disappointed tt im th last on yr list but its a fact already . I cant change anything . Im really depressed , but you guys think tt i am just sooo strong but you know whats th fact ? Im really depressed , im really tired , im really very vulnerable . Im helpless of what to do already , i can only let my tears down when you two are in yr sleep and im awake letting my tears drop . I hate how much i really believe in you guys tt one day you will proudly say " Yes , she is my daughter " but you know what ? You guys never said it , not even once . Perhaps im just sucha disgrace to you guys , i understand and from now on i will accept this fact and not have false hopes on you guys tt you will proudly tell peeps tt im yr daughter . Im just too tired ..

I cried , but you never noticed .