Terrible

"It all seems to be like a dream , but th pain in my heart makes me know tt this really happened".

Everything is over now . I hoped tt i was just a nightmare but th tears tt drops my eyes reminds me tt this really had happened before . Th tears are just too stubborn , it just refuses to stop . I cried alone , i cried silently . Because im afraid tt you'll see this weak side of me . I want you to only remember th strong side of me , I want you to remember tt i am a crazy girl tt is optimistic to everything . I dont want you to see th weakest side of me , which is so pathetic . Yr memory of me will only be "Charmaine being th happiest girl on earth , she smiles at every single little thing , she laughs at everything she sees and even when she cries , it will be tears of laughter . " And not , " Charmaine cries too , she never smiled truthfully and when she cries , are tears of pain and hurt . "
I'll shall let yr memory of me , stop at th strongest side of me . Im sorry but , I guess i am just like any other human being . I laugh when im happy and sob when im down .
Why when i see yr teddybear and flowers tears will just start dropping ? Why cant these stubborn tears of mine listen to me ? Why does th sight of you makes me down again ?

God , take me out of misery . Take me away with you if you want , just dont let me live in such pain tt i cant express to anyone . Prayers to you are made and please grant my prayers .

Sleepless nights , my whole mind is our memories when we smiled , laughed , argued and loved ..